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In 1986 my kidneys failed and I began in-center dialysis. I was 21 years old. To say that the change from being a strapping, landscaper-by-trade, physically active individual to a person who got winded walking up a single flight of stairs was devastating only begins to touch on the truth of my experience with dialysis in those early years. For eight torturous months I watched helplessly as my body’s strength deteriorated and I fought a losing battle with the results of the process of being treated for my kidney disease: daily nausea, fatigue, physical discomfort, and psychological stress. A kidney transplant provided five years of relief. After the transplant failed, I resumed in-center dialysis. Though the technology of hemodialysis had improved and my experience was measurably better, I was still severely limited in my physical activities. My exercise was limited to sporadic bike rides that, though still enjoyable, ultimately only reinforced how restricted my physical life had become as compared to before my kidneys failed. Landscaping was out of the question so I pursued a career in my second love, mobile electronics. After a few progressively difficult years even the comparatively low physical demands of my new employment path became too much for me. Due to dialysis related problems with illness, stamina, fatigue, and the necessity of dialysis treatments three times per week, 5 hours per treatment, I had no choice but to leave my job.

Knowing that a career based on physical ability would not be possible as a dialysis patient I enrolled in college to pursue a degree in psychology. My goal was to obtain a doctorate degree and become a clinical psychologist. If I had known then that dialysis and its effects would cause my academic journey to take 11 years just to get my bachelor degree, I probably would have done something else. Along the way I tried CAPD in the hopes of feeling better and freeing up more of my time, but it didn’t work well for me. I am now doing home hemodialysis with the NxStage System One machine and am very happy with it. It allows me to dialyze on a schedule that I have much more control over and has left me feeling the best I ever have while on hemodialysis.

After meeting and talking with Shad my dreams and goals around exercise came roaring back in my mind. I had given up on hard, physical exercise (something that had been a very important part of my life) and now I want it back. Cycling is still my true exercise of choice. I plan on cross-training with weights and running to get my cycling conditioning to the point where I am able to achieve my goal of riding a section of the Tour de France (a shorter one!) next year. Thanks to Shad’s inspiration and assistance, the miles will once again be rolling beneath my wheels.

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Jon received a gym membership and personal trainer.

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Charlene received a gym membership and personal trainer.

Hi Shad,

I was fortunate enough to be a part of your fitness grant program over a year ago (Oct 2005) by training Charlene C in Seal Beach, California. I have been so busy opening up my own fitness studio since then that I haven’t got a chance to write up a page on Charlene and her progress, my bio, etc. But as I was training her today (yes, she is still coming faithfully 2 times a week!) I was just telling her how proud I was of her… of how far she has come along and how much her attitude has improved. So I thought to myself, let me at least write a quick e-mail to Shad just to let him know what a wonderful thing he has done for this person he has never met way out in California, Charlene…so Shad, here I am on my lunch break giving you thanks from both of us. You are a wonderful, special person who made a great impact on a stranger’s life. You gave Charlene hope. Because of your fitness grant Charlene now is living her life with a completely different attitude. You inspired her and gave her a chance that she didn’t think she had. She now thinks exercise is the most important thing she needs to be doing for herself and always says it is the best part of her day. She has confidence now like never before because of what she accomplishes physically, in the studio. Charlene and I are planning to get together and write about her experience and take some pictures becaue we would love to share more with you and your readers.

Thank you very much,
Rebecca

Kim received coaching and equipment from the foundation. She will be running in the Boston Marathon in 2007.

I am a 43 year old single mother of two daughters, ages 19 and 15, and have been divorced for 11 years. I ran marathons for the past 13 years, worked out at the gym for over twenty years. Before I was diagnosed with kidney failure, I was a legal assistant in a law firm in Newport Beach; a volunteer with abusive children’s home; and a member of the Anti-Defamation League and Steinberg Leadership Institute.

On February 1, 2005, was when my entire life changed and I was diagnosed with end-stage renal failure. At the time, I had no symptoms [so I thought] and routine blood work showed that I had only five percent kidney function. I was immediately admitted to the hospital where I had every diagnostic test performed, countless blood work, and surgery. The surgery included a “fistula” and a temporary catheter. My red blood cell count was 6.7. Normal ranger is 11 to 13. I was given a blood transfusion while in the hospital.

Soon after I was discharged from the hospital, the fistula clogged and I underwent a second surgery. A few days later, the second fistula clogged. The vascular surgeon then requested a “bilateral venogram” in which an IV was inserted into both of my arms and dye was injected to see which veins were the strongest to sew onto the main artery. A week later, the third surgery was performed and I thought this finally worked as we can actually feel the blood flow in my wrist. Among everything my girls and I have gone through on Wednesday, March 16, 2005, we laid to rest our pug, Lucky. Lucky was diagnosed with, of all things, chronic renal failure. Less than a week after my third surgery, on March 17, 2005, the fistula failed and I am now faced with a fourth surgery. I have now had six surgeries in three months in an attempt to have a functioning fistula. I had my fourth surgery on May 4, the fifth on May 20, and the sixth on May 22.

On July 17, 2005, I was admitted to the emergency room because the catheter in my chest became infected. On July 19 they removed the catheter and ran a biopsy to see if there was any bacterial infection. The test came back negative. Then, on July 21 I had another surgery to insert a new catheter. It has been a long and tiring road to recovery. I have battled depression, insomnia, migraines, and countless trips to the emergency room. Dialysis causes me to become so ill that I cannot function afterward. I have lost all energy to enable me to run and workout.

Then on March 20, 2006, I had my first telephone conversation with Shad. Shad’s energy and enthusiasm has given me strength and inspiration to accomplish my dream of not only completing a marathon, but to qualify for Boston. Shad told me that taking baby steps is what I need to do and not to expect to be at the level I was at before I became ill. I shortly started training and although I have a long way to go, Shad has inspired me not to give up.

See you in Boston 2007, Shad !!

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Kevin received a gym membership and personal training from the foundation.

My name is Kevin. I am 52 years old. I lost kidney function when I was 50 years old after battling diabetes for most of my life. It was a nightmare at first. I lost all of my strength and stamina. I faced many sleepless nights. Finally, after starting in-center hemodialysis, I started feeling better.

When starting dialysis, I was introduced to my social worker, Jennifer Roberts. I told her I was starting the process of getting on the list for a kidney-pancreas transplant. The transplant center told me I needed to lose weight and stop smoking, which are two things very difficult for me to accomplish on my own. Jennifer told me about the Peg Smythe Fitness Grant, offered through the Shad Ireland Foundation. Its purpose is to assist dialysis patients in reaching their fitness goals under the supervision of a certified personal trainer at a local gym. I eagerly applied for the grant, with Jennifer’s assistance.

A few months later, the foundation informed me that I would be receiving a grant for a membership and personal training to my local YMCA. I am excited to start my exercise program at the YMCA so I can reach my goals.

I would like to thank the Shad Ireland Foundation for the grant and wonderful opportunity it will provide for me. I would also like to thank my social worker, Jennifer Roberts, for her kindness and knowledge, and most of all, just being herself.

Sincerely,
Kevin

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It will be two years on September 24, 2006 since I was diagnosed with renal failure. Honestly, it never occured to me that something like this could ever happen. Before I was diagnosed with kidney failure I worked as a photographer and production assistant at a local community newspaper. I also worked on my own photography projects and would spend hours on the internet and bookstore researching other photographers. I also spent a huge part of my free time either checking out shows at the local art galleries, attending community poetry readings, or checking out the latest indie flicks. I have always been an avid lover of art. Photography, especially, is what most inspires me and has helped me through this period in my life.

Only a couple of months before I was diagnosed I watched a health show on CNN which featured the story of a woman who had kidney failure. It was the first time I ever heard of dialysis. I remember feeling frightened by the procedure and hoped that it would never happen to me, but life, like one of my friends used to say, “has a twisted sense of humor.”

The night before I went into the hospital, I had a really bad nosebleed. I rarely ever had nosebleeds, but for about a year they became more and more frequent. This nosebleed, though, was not like the others. It went on for hours. From about 8pm to midnight. The next morning, my sister got up to take my mom to work and after they left the taste of blood in my mouth woke me. The bleeding had come back. I took a quick shower and when my sister got home I asked her to take me to the Emergency Room at LA County Hospital. I waited to get treated for about three hours. After some routine blood tests the nurse said that the “numbers were weird” and had to do them again. In the meantime she treated my nosebleed. She pulled out a blood clot the size of a baseball out of my nose. When we both saw the size of it, we were both in utter shock. She immediately handed me a blue cloth then went to call her peers to go check out the huge blood clot that came out of my nose. They were all in awe. I was grossed out. I had the taste of blood in my mouth for over twelve hours. She then put a nose rocket up my nose to stop the bleeding and asked me to wait. A few minutes went by, she then showed up with some paper work and a hospital robe and told me I needed to be hospitalized. A few hours later while waiting to be transferred to a room I learned that my kidneys had stopped working and I had chronic anemia. I first received dialysis the next morning, on September 25. It was then, when the first femoral catheter was put in my groin that I realized what was really happening to me, before then I was in a stage of disbelief and denial. I went from working at a local newspaper two days prior to being hospitalized in county, of all places, and getting dialysis. I was hospitalized for a total of 18 days, in which I learned that the cause of my renal failure was vasculitis, an immune deficiency disease.

After I was released from the hospital, I began to receive dialysis treatment at DaVita-USC. I stopped working and became utterly depressed. My life wasn’t my life anymore. I felt like I had lost control of it. About a month later, the day before Thanksgiving I went back to county to have my fistula put in, but I had a high fever and a staph infection which welcomed me back into county hospital for another 23 days. The first time I was hospitalized, I was in a room with seven other patients, this time I was in isolation and had my own tiny room because of the staph infection. The room looked like it was straight out of David Lynch film. The things I remember most about it was that it had a huge air purifier which was always on and was loud, very loud, and the view of a drained industrial pool. While hospitalized the doctors, on many occasions, tried to talk me into taking anti-depressants and even had psychiatrists come in to evaluate and talk to me. Honestly, I didn’t want any of them helping me. I felt like I had to take control of my life and my emotions on my own without the help of their chemical happiness. I realized I was strong before any of that had ever happened to me there wasn’t a reason why I couldn’t regain that strength. Which I slowly have. It has not been easy because my life is not what it used to be.

Although, my life is different now, I’ve learned to accept it and live with it. I’m thankful that I have so many people encouraging me to continue my dreams. I still work on my own photography projects. Many of my friends have become my “subjects” at one time or another. They know that photography is my best therapy. It helps me deal with my emotions and allows me to be creative, which I believe is my best asset. My family is very supportive as well, especially my parents. At this moment I’m in the process of getting my kidney transplant. My dad is the donor. With the fitness grant, I believe it will take me closer to my dream of being as fit as I possibly can be so i can get my transplant as soon as possible and have the opportunity to travel and take pictures of whatever place I find myself in. I know that if I am as physically fit as I can be when going into surgery, it will only help me through the recovery process.

Someday I hope to have my own photo show at a gallery where I will display this whole journey through the images I’ve created along the way. Hopefully, it will serve as inspiration to others who are in similar situations.

Edward received a 1 year gym membership from the foundation.

I am a 63 year old African American male. I have been on dialysis for 7 years now. I have participated in sports such as football, semi-pro, basketball and boxing. I was also on the track team and ran hurdles. In 2001 I had both of my legs amputated above the knees. Despite my health challenges I continue to exercise and drive, 2 years ago I drove across country to visit family. I would like to join a gym and start working with weights and swimming.

Luis received a gym membership from the foundation.

I have lost both of my parents, my mom was on dialysis. I want to loose weight to be able to reach my goal. Then I would love to be able to reach my dream in helping other people and being a great example for others and join Shad’s team. I am like an angel always willing to help people I would rather bring a smile and laughter to people instead of seeing them down and depressed. I hope you can help me to fulfill my dream. God bless you all.

Howard received a Trek Mountain bike from the foundation.

I have been on dialysis for 3 ½ years now and all my energy has been geared toward the treatments. My treatments are 3 times a week for 4 ½ hours a day. When I am done I am way too tired to do anything. I want to get back to what I once was, that is playing basketball, riding bike just doing things that I once enjoyed doing every day.

Joel received a Trek Mountain bike from the foundation.

I was diagnosed with polycystic kidneys at the age of 8. I was healthy until my mid 20’s, when my kidney function decreased to almost non-existent. I became very ill and started dialysis and got on the transplant list. I realized that yes I have a serious disease but I am armed with many weapons to help myself. I started working out three to four times a week and improving my diet.